Bono v Bono

Steve Dbrockavitch

Los Angeles, CA — With the stroke of a pen, U2 frontman Bono made history today as the first person to ever file an intellectual property suit against himself.  Alleging that he invented the Vaguely Spiritual Social Anthem in 1989, filed under U.S. Patent 119822.4(c), he contends that he owes himself $3.75 million in royalties.

Representing the singer, attorney Milibrak Hurt, of the prestigious, Hurt, Farsely, Scamton, Dbrockavitch*, Neerwell, and Van de Fluur said Bono “pioneered his iconic sound and deserves credit and compensation when anyone, even himself, uses it without permission.  With this landmark case we hope to not only vindicate our client, but also set a precedent for artist in the future to protect their work from themselves.”

Speaking at a press conference, through an interpreter he said, “Look, the most important thing you can do is be true to yourself, and I wouldn’t be if I allow myself to fleece my own ideas.  What would Ghandi think?  It’s like a deep breath you know; peace, with handful of breadcrumbs and who even saw it coming.”

Although preliminary hearings have been held, depositions taken, and a court date set, sources from within the defense team say there are talks of a settlement.  The case may not go to court if Bono will agree to donate $3.75 million to teach self actualization to children in Nicaragua.

*no relation

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